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133 lines
4.2 KiB
Text
133 lines
4.2 KiB
Text
==Phrack Inc.==
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Volume Two, Issue 13, Phile #4 of 10
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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/|\ the Neon Fucken Knights /|\
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\|/ present with no alternative \|/
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/|\HOW TO BUILD A PAISLEY BOX! /|\
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\|/ by the fucked up Blade \|/
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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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All right, so i mfucken in 40 cols..what's it matter? i just
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realized that many idoits out ther still dont know how to make one of
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the greatest anarchiust tools ever, the Paisley Box. This little
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beauty will do just about anuyt6hing ya want, including:
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--Seize operator lines
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--Remote control over all TSPS and TOPS consols
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--All other box functions combind in oine, includin blue, beige, and
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blotto
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so ya wanna know how to build this fucker and go out terrorizin ma
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bell..well sit tight, we wont bother with any fucken diagrams cause
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those are for dweebs (right necro? right!) here we go!
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first of all get about 20 lbs of quality drugs and 3 or 4 kegs. you
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might
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think that you need this for the contruction of the box but, you don't
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you take it all yerself!!
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this will mellow ya out enuf to follow our planz. lessee, oh yea
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parts list:
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--about 50 ffeet of copper wier, hopfully insulated
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--an old (prefer touchton) phone that ya dont need no more
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--a honda genorateer (don't pay for it, just card it. right necro?
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right!)
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--and one of the empty kegs that ya drank to put it all in. the
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genarater will fit fine and the rest ya can attach to the outsid if
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thats your fucken urge.
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now for tha actualy construciton details:
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oh shit, we forgot one fuckin thing. go to you local hadware stoer and
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find the guy who owns it, get a gun and blow his fuckin head off (you
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can card the gun two) this isn't for the box but, it fun and it will
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make satan happy so yor box will work better.
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now with the empty keg and all the stuf we put up there ( i think
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about 20 lins ofr so up )_ attach the genarater to all the other shit
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however ya please, now get some nice paisley wallpaper from your mom
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9(steal it if she wants it still) and put it all on the oputsid of teh
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keg. you now have a 100% genuine Neon Knights approvd Paisley Box!
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How touse:
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hook that son of a bithc up to yir modem (thats only if you got a 212
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cat. if you don't then you are an asshole anyway and the box will
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blow you fucken house aprt but, satan will be happy.)
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now turn yer dam computer on, and when the prkmpt comes up(
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hardwird into the box of cors! whatdday think we are, stupid? )
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type: 666 (space) SATAN RULES (space) MY SWEET SATAN!
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then the menu will coume up on you screen and it will say.
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1) fuck the operator around
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2) take control of the pentagon
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3) imitatte boxes (blue, blotto)
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4) fuck-a-geek
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choose whatever ya want, except if ya get tired of it and want to
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trash th thing type 666 for a choice. the box will sef destructt, yer
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computer will explod, anmd in its trahsing death throes speak an
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chant taht will summon satan to take you away to the depths of
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HELL!!!
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use this masterpece proerly, and remember: NO FUCKEN LOSERS!
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`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'`'
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Call these genocidal systemz:
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The Gatest of Hell 555-51325-634637-3
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1200 ONLY DAMMIT!
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Mephisto's Suicidal Nightmare 2436-234-666 (of course!)
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1200 ONLY DAMMIT!
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The Dead Fuckers Realm 2436-99-2309
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300 only for now (dammit!)
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sorry for the sloppy look compared to our usual k00l neat files, but my
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computer got confiscate d by the fucke n pigs so i have to
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telerwit this fucker usin a dumb terminal, until i card another!
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should be within the week!
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but don't forget to call the rad Metal AE
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201-879-[666]8 9600 baud only (god fuckin dammit) 4 drives with 710
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megs soon (we promise this time).
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Kneon Nights "We're Rad, we kill children!!"
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end of file
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i said end of file dammit!
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what are you still fucken readin for? hit escape you stupid
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shithead!
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if you dont fucken hit escape i will call satan on you!!!
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fuck the dead!
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***
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***
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***
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***
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***********
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***********
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***
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***
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Oral roberts is the anti-christ!!!
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oh and remember: this has been a fucken parody from thomas fucken
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covenant and double fucken helix. Call Thieve's World, the last
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bastion of free thought: 616-344-2718.
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"Whaddya mean I don't believe in God? ... I talk to him every day!"
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